December 22, 2008

In hard times, pets of economically unfit owners suffer

People who can't find a way to shave $50 off of their monthly budget to take care of their pets are simply abandoning them. There's a 1/2 chance that these will be euthanized.

When I am elected dictator, not only will the stupid be prevented from breeding, but they won't be allowed to be in charge of animal life either. As humiliating to the animals' self-esteem as upper-class pet fashions may be, at least they're not in the pitiable state that animals in lower-class areas are. If you've been through a poor area and seen the scrawny dogs and cats whose fur is stained by filth, you know what I mean.

How long will the recession last -- two years, if it's as bad as the early '80s? So you go into minor debt at worst for two years, and then pay it back in better times. I'm sure your pets will be thankful when they're still living. Goddamnit, what's next -- abandoning your kids because you can't afford diapers for two years?

If there's any justice in the world, the abandoned pets will sense what's up, turn on their owners, and feed off of their obese carcasses until they can find adopters.

9 comments:

  1. That is horrible! I could never do that!

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  2. Goddamnit, what's next -- abandoning your kids because you can't afford diapers for two years?

    There are increasing reports of too-young children being left home alone because their parents can't afford day care.

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  3. "If there's any justice in the world, the abandoned pets will sense what's up, turn on their owners, and feed off of their obese carcasses until they can find adopters."

    pay per view! i would watch.

    in other news, i wonder what else suffers the indignities of loser morality in economic downtimes? those junkers they drive certainly get worse, spewing more burnt oil out of their exhausts. there are more waddling mediocrities clogging up cheapo tourist traps. i can't take a date to the zoo without having my view of the elephants blocked by a supersized family of five.

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  4. Attaching one's compassion and idealism to another species. SWPL mentality at its finest.

    East asian pragmatism should be applied to the problem. The solution is much tastier.

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  5. Anonymous8:31 PM

    LOL Karl.


    PETA= P. E. T. A.=

    People (who)
    Eat
    Tasty
    Animals



    Ive told that little joke to a couple of left-wingers. I induced nasuea within them (which is exactly what I hoped for).

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  6. Anonymous6:44 AM

    http://roissy.wordpress.com/2008/12/19/i-am-in-the-globe-and-mail/#comment-41863

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  7. Above link

    Blogger doesn't let you leave links in comments, unless they're formatted or whatever.

    Really though, I haven't been following what Spike and that Gen X harpy have been saying in response, after maybe the first response and PA's remarks. They're not worthy opponents, and it gets boring.

    Same anytime that loser tries to start something at 2blowhards. You just feel sorry for him after awhile.

    No surprise what you linked to, though -- he always made it clear that he was a chronically depressed druggie. Most such people usually get a hit rock song or a poetry anthology out of the deal, but not him. But at least he's left about 10 million internet comments to posterity.

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  8. I do have to LOL at the fact that the diary is on livejournal, though -- I may be attracted to 15 year-old gothie girls, but at least I don't write like one.

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  9. I usually give to Friends of the Forest, but this year I gave to the local humane society instead, for exactly the reasons laid out here. The impetus was actually a 'public service announcement' that plays on radio stations during commercial breaks if you're listening to them online.

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