April 20, 2008

Further musings on Boobmen and Assmen

I reviewed the findings of what may be the only scientific study of what psychological traits belong to men who prefer boobs, ass, or legs. The Boobman appears to be a gregarious "guy's guy," while the Assman seems more like the Type A businessman or leader. *

Just thinking it over, I discovered that geeks are predominantly Boobmen. The converse is not true, but I have a hunch that the average "geek score" among Boobmen would be higher than among Assmen. Think of guys who watch cartoons, especially Japanese ones, and play video games during most of their leisure time. Cartoon girls who are meant to look sexy always have big boobs, and little or no ass -- just see any Anime female, or the Lara Croft character from the video game Tomb Raider. Their creators must know what their audience likes.

Are badboys more likely to be Assmen? It seems so. First, the only cartoon girls I've ever seen who had big butts are from the video for Weird Al's "Close But No Cigar", in which a Byronic badboy cannot restrain himself from berating his girlfriends. The three pickup artist bloggers who I read are all Assmen (Roissy, RooshV, and Virgle Kent). If anyone's read all 3500 pages of Casanova's memoirs, does he suggest whether he's an Assman or not? Or other famous libertines?

If there are any criminologists reading this, are violent criminals more likely to prefer buttocks to boobs? I googled and couldn't find anything, but maybe there is anecdotal evidence.

In trying to recall all instances of a female remarking on another female's looks, I think I've never or rarely heard something like, "Woah, she's got a hot ass," but have heard "She has really nice breasts." And I mean when the female observer makes this remark spontaneously -- what does she notice and feel moved to comment on? Obviously if the conversation is already about Jennifer Lopez, she will say "By the way, she's got a pretty big booty, huh?"

On a population level, the correlation holds (compare Africans, Europeans, and Asians, or Mediterraneans vs. Scandinavians), but that doesn't mean it holds on an individual level.

One possible source of all of this variation (established or conjectural) is level of testosterone. It would be pretty easy to set up a study on college males to see if preference for boobs vs. buttocks correlated with levels of salivary testosterone, or if that's too expensive, then their digit ratio. Clearly, more research is needed.

Another interesting line of research would be to see what traits women with larger breasts vs. larger buttocks had. If Assmen tend to be more Type A, and if they get what they're after, then the daughters of such a marriage would inherit both big butts and a feisty personality. Similarly, the daughters of a Boobman and woman with large breasts would be buxom and gregarious or chatty. So maybe a girl's shape tells you something about her personality or behavior. These patterns would hold at the population level, not necessarily at the individual level, since they would result from cross-assortative mating.

Come to think of it -- have you ever seen a wet t-shirt contest or a "booty battle"? It could have been in person or on TV, as long as it wasn't fictional or they were put up to it (like in a strip club). The wet t-shirt girls try to play up their girliness, coyness, or ditziness, whereas the girls who volunteer for the booty battle are definitely more competitive and feisty. And just think how incongruous the phrase "boobie battle" would sound.

* Giving new meaning to the letters in Type B vs. Type A.


  1. I've always thought of the difference as being mainly class-based. Men from the middle class on up are mostly boobmen, while assmen tend to be working class.

  2. Two points: one, you've forgotten "leg men", who may be a minority but do exist. Two, you should keep in mind that men generally appear to believe that it is nearly impossible to have breasts that are too large, while the same cannot be said, alas, for their attitude to female hindquarters. This is why women are more likely to praise another woman's bosom than her behind: praise for the latter could be seen as hinting that it is too large.

  3. I covered leg men in the review of that psych study. Since they're a minority, I don't have a good intuitive feel for what they're like.

    That's not true about guys always wanting bigger breasts -- the psych study shows that there are men who prefer small breasts. Not that I keep track of them well, but the comments I hear from breast men do include things like "I'm a breast man -- small and perky are best." "More than a handful is a waste" is another.

    It may be hard to believe, but I actually don't notice breast size unless it's pointed out. I couldn't tell you which girls on campus, or which celebrities, have large breasts, but could accurately rank them by posterior size.

    And some ass men prefer more moderate sized rumps too -- the classification is based on what area we focus on, not so much what size we like it to be.

    You'd know better than I would about why females don't remark about another female's rump -- but are you suggesting that they're as likely to notice a nice butt, and just refrain from saying so aloud out of politeness? I always got the impression that they were never impressed in the first place.

  4. You know, I'm definitely a leg/ass man...and I generally think that girls with hot asses tend to be more feisty/competitive, and girls with big boobs tend to be girlier.

  5. Is there no such thing as a face man? Men who go for beautiful faces and notice that more than body shapes etc.

  6. Every man is a face man, in the sense of noticing the face, being particular about it, valuing it, etc.

    The boob man, ass man, leg man distinctions point to how men vary among themselves.

  7. I have to second Agnostic on being a boobman vs. liking really large boobs. I'm a boobman and prefer smaller ones.

    I'm a bit of a legman too. Asses do nothing for me at all. A great ass is like great elbows. First, how can you tell? And second, so what?

    Its a shame Rina put her blog behind an invite wall.

  8. I don't know what to make of myself in terms of this distinction. I'm an admitted boob man, but I want women with boobs and an ass, and much of my porn collection leans towards women who in the best way possible meet both requirements. I'm not a bad boy nor do I exhibit traits that would illustrate any leadership.

  9. I think there's a big racial component to this. I'm a Japanophile nerd but also an athletics nut and have spent lots of time playing basketball with black guys (and maybe a legman, although I'm not really sure how to describe it--I just like athletic women generally, and that entails all three). And black guys are more likely to be assmen than white guys are, however the breakdown works out among white guys.

  10. To use the politically correct ethnic term, I'm a San.

  11. Imo the difference between a boobman and an assman is the difference between the man who will stay with a woman and raise children with her versus the man who will impregnate her then leave and do it to another woman. Now I know from experience this does not hold true for all, but it's just a generalization.

    Women from Northern climes in general do not have large asses the way that women from hotter/more tropical areas do. Yes, another generalization, but I know of no ass-measurement studies to cite. Men in those regions are also less likely to stay for life with a woman they impregnate.

    In hotter climates, it is women who do the agricultural/field work while men sit on their asses. This is based on different things I've read over the years about various third world cultures. Because a woman with large hindquarters would have greater stamina at agricultural work, the man would not need to stick around to ensure his children reach adulthood. She would be able to provide for the children without his daily assistance. In other words, a large ass holds the promise of greater promiscuity because there is no need to stay with the woman to ensure the children reach adulthood. They evaluate a woman's ass in the same way a farmer would evaluate an oxen's hindquarters to see how well it can drag a plow. Northern European/Northeast Asian women wouldn't need to have huge asses because they're not the ones tilling fields. Where the land is frozen or excessively rocky or just plain inhospitable to easy agriculture, the women would have smaller/flatter derrieres.

    Now please blow holes in my theory.

    As an aside: I have never understood the affection for butts that some men have. Throughout most of human history I'm sure the ass was completely filthy. I'll never get it. When I first found out that some guys liked asses, my first response was to wonder if they were into scatplay.

  12. Yeah, assmen are more likely to let their eyes and bodies wander.

    It's a shame that there is no agreed-upon measurement system for buttocks size. Look at how intricate it is for breasts: chest circumference, plus a graded measure of how far they stick out.

    This must be awful when women by pants -- what if the pants are for DD buttocks, but they have A buttocks?

    Butt size has nothing to do with female farming, sorry. ;) They're pretty big in places where females have had little or no economic power, and where they didn't perform subsistence farming on their own. Basically, the old Islamic Empire: the Mediterranean, Near and Middle East, and South Asia.

    The ass is the most sexual of the secondary sex characteristics, so there must be something about the ecology that makes men be particularly sexual in evaluating a mate -- maybe pathogen load (why not) -- so that females have been selected to fit this male preference.

    Assmen aren't interested in the anus, or necessarily anal sex -- just the look and feel of the buttocks. Trying to teach a female why some men like butts is like her trying to teach us why some women like backs.

  13. Hmmm... wasn't the Middle East at one point the home of the "Fertile Crescent"? Indeed, if you're going to assume a pre-agriculture hunter (males)/gatherer (female) dichotomy, then it makes sense women would do a lot more bending over lol. Women would also be more heavily involved in the transition to agriculture in such a situation. Before agriculture could constitute a dependable foodstuff, it would make sense for men to continue to devote the majority of their effort to hunting. In Asian cultures, who engages the most in rice farming? Who engaged the most in this sort of farming 1000 years ago?

    Haha This is all prompted by the workout my friend and I have been doing that targets the ass. Most of it seems to involve bending over and damn it hurts.

  14. Having your nipples stroked feels good and is usually a turn on - buttocks are not particularly sensitive and not a particular turn on when touched, felt, stroked. Tits have a place in sex, buttocks - no more so than any other body part like the feet - there not a sexual organ. There for sitting on.


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