December 31, 2008

The thinking man's sex symbols -- yeah right

While looking for a list of sex symbols across the ages, I stumbled across this list of Thinking Man's Sex Symbols. I've never seen such shameless fawning over ugly, simpleminded, and annoying women. (Tina Fey's OK.) And they're almost all really old too. Perhaps the author Toure is trying to argue that a man starts using his brain when his dick no longer functions. But what he ends up demonstrating is laziness of both the mind and groin.

I'm not going to waste as much time as he did thinking up a better list -- let alone spell out why his lists sucks -- but here are a few. I'll even stick to over-30 women, since presumably that's who his audience wanted to see.

Jennifer Beals, the chick from Flashdance. Got into Yale before she became famous, though she majored in American Lit. Cute as a button -- especially compared to her peers. And she was born in 1963, so she gets bonus points for belonging to the disco / punk generation. Main drawback: black-white biracial, so may have a huge chip on her shoulder. Could be totally wrong about that -- just noting the possibility.

Pardis Sabeti, human genetics researcher who studies recent natural selection. Super-smart, plays in an alternative rock band, and is Persian. She could hold her own among actresses, but compared to female academics, she's probably #1. Main drawback: belongs to Generation X, and her deep concern about getting more women into science still sounds like a 1993 late-night conversation among college sophomore activists.

Danica McKellar, aka Winnie Cooper from The Wonder Years. Math wiz who co-authored a proof in mathematical physics with a professor when she was an undergrad at UCLA. She indulges her nurturing instinct by writing books to help middle school girls -- the smart ones, anyhow -- get through the bewildering jungle of math after arithmetic. Main drawback: also Gen-X, and gives off a slight ball-busting vibe.

Jennifer Connelly, the clever and courageous girl from Labyrinth. (No matter how many other movies I see with her in it, that's who she'll always be.) Studied at Yale before transferring to Stanford. Although Gen-X, she doesn't show it, from what little I've seen. Main drawback: now has a man-jaw, but she's 38, so it's not unusual.

Probably several more, but this off-the-cuff list just shows how clear your mind can be when you don't lick the rancid crotch of feminist ideology.


  1. Jennifer Beals is very light and Caucasian-looking* for a biracial person. I would imagine that her father was himself racially mixed and light-skinned. Combined with the fact that her husband is not black, it's relatively unlikely that she has any anger about her background.

    * = she's notably less black-appearing that the 1/4-black Joakim Noah or the even less-black Malcolm Gladwell

  2. LOL.


    Here is a picture of the kind of woman "sensitive, thinking" men REALLY dream about while getting their educated wives from behind,

    Hint: she is a pornstar. And she is physically (my opinion) damn near perfect.

  3. Hm, your posts often creep me out, but I'm with you here. Mr Toure is out of his mind, and you're list is classy.

  4. I only just recently learned who Kerry Howley is and I would love nothing more than busting a creamy nut all over her face.

    But only because she's a Smart Girl, of course.

  5. @Tupac

    Kerry Howley is an open borders nut. It would never work.

  6. Hm, your posts often creep me out, but I'm with you here. Mr Toure is out of his mind, and you're list is classy.

    I try to keep that part of me under wraps.

  7. @ Anonymous:

    Well, I'm half hispanic so that would give me an in I guess. For the night, at least. That's all I'd need.

  8. You need to add old school screen siren Hedy Lamarr to your list. Sexpot movie star by day, inventor of spread spectrum communication (i.e. WiFi) by night.

    Hubba hubba!

  9. I thought about Hedy Lamarr, but kept it to living people.


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