September 22, 2006

Of course lonelygirl15 is fake

Initial coverage & comments here, here, here, and here. Did we really need to discover the actual data that proved she was a fake? This video-bloggin girl was supposed to be quirky, lonesome, and into the mysterious but also fascinated by Feynman and Jared Diamond -- this despite the fact that she's also supposed to be a 16-y.o. red-hot babe (in reality, she's "twenty-ish" according to the Gray Lady). Anyone who hasn't had their eyes sewn shut could have seen that this was just another example of nerd voyeurism. Into science, yet also the occult (for the Dungeons & Dragons-playing computer programmers)? Check. Misunderstood by the world, just like you? Check. All alone, tempting you to work up some guts for once in your pathetic life and rescue the cloistered maiden? Check. Flawless skin, alluring shape, and doe eyes? Check. And young enough not to have yet decayed into the desiccated careerism you have to deal with in your cubicle existence? Check. It was so obvious!

I'd like to think the people who fell for this were a bunch of teenage blockheads, but one of the three "Bree-seekers" who orchestrated a sting operation to uncover her true identity was a 36-y.o. computer programmer from Tulsa, Oklahoma. So, hypothetically old enough and brainy enough to know better -- but when your life is programming computers in Tulsa, you'll get wrapped up in any silly, seductive notion that lets you believe that everyone else really is crazy, that the females around you are really robots / aliens who've either wiped out or kidnapped all of the real females, like Bree -- and if they failed to sequester her, there surely must be many more like her! A small aperture leading into Wonderland! Grow up dude.

To a certain degree, I sympathize: life sucks for geeks and dorks, so the appeal is obvious of believing that you're in The Matrix and that a Trinity girl not only exists but is actively seeking you out. I'll even allow it if a geek wants to create such a fictional female character like Aeon Flux, or Trinity, or Laura Croft -- provided they don't fall in love with their Galatea (even more tempting in the case of an ingenue like Bree who requires cultivation). There are real girls out there, some of whom may actually give you a chance, though they won't be the hottest or most adventurous of females. And even if you're lucky enough to initially attract a hottie, giving in to Matrix-like thinking will only result in you idolizing her; and if there's one thing real girls never want, it's being put on a pedastal. By impressing upon her that she's so above you, you've visually proved that you're beneath her -- and that last thing real girls want is to date below their level. I'm sure they'd say something self-serving like, "Oh, I'm too humble to want to be worshipped" -- bullshit. The only reason they wouldn't want to be worshipped is that only a delta-male would follow them around.

1 comment:

  1. I could tell (or so I told myself) by the fourth or fifth episode...of course, I already knew when I started watching.

    That girl began to get annoying fast.


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