tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post5591177645277430712..comments2024-03-28T15:33:41.463-04:00Comments on Face to Face: Gay Peter Pan-isms: Aversion to baby-making / quiet storm songs agnostichttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12967177967469961883noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-40920142075724307272020-02-21T06:04:07.094-05:002020-02-21T06:04:07.094-05:00Power pop is another post-pubescent genre that gay...Power pop is another post-pubescent genre that gays avoid (zero crossover on the gay anthem list). That's more of an adolescent genre, whereas quiet storm is mature, but that just goes to show that they're developmentally stuck in a pre-pubescent state, not simply "younger than married grown-ups with children". It's all the way back to age 5 (plus a sex drive).<br /><br />Adolescence is when courtship begins, beyond the initial infatuation, and that back-and-forth between boy-and-girl is what power pop is about.<br /><br />Unrequited love is a common theme in power pop, and it's not just a bratty pouting that the person you like doesn't like you back, so they must suck and who cares about their stupid feelings for you anyway (alternatively: woe is me, the world's going to end, wah wah wah). Adolescent feelings of unrequited love are more back-and-forth than that -- you try to change yourself, or grow somehow, in order to adapt yourself to your crush's desires. It's how the social sense develops, rather than stay the same and insist that everyone else adapt to us (the bratty, pre-social child's stance).<br /><br />Ultimately the adolescent crush and courtship is meant to lead to a stable pair bond, not just a one-night-stand or a fuck-buddy situation. Maybe they aren't getting married and raising a family yet, but they're moving in that pair-bonded direction.<br /><br />It feels really different than the way you felt toward others as a pre-pubescent child -- getting stuck on whether someone else wants you or not, whereas before you didn't value anyone else's attachment (outside your own family, of course).<br /><br />The yearning and longing is not purely physical, it's a social yearning -- to be pair-bonded, to be her one-and-only guy, and to have her all to yourself, in an enduring relationship.<br /><br />I've never heard gays talk about their own adolescence or current relationships that way, where it reminds you of a song by the Searchers or Tom Petty or Matthew Sweet. It's something only heterosexual guys can identify with (who are current adolescents, or are adults with a more adolescent mindset).<br /><br />Bonus: quiet storm meets power pop. "Being With You" by Smokey Robinson (1981).<br /><br />https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOf-9fgyZdI<br /><br />The simple, stripped-down instrumentation, driving rhythm (with a little backbeat), only with a bouncy syncopated bass-line in place of the jangly guitar chord progression. It's an R&B or soul-inflected kind of power pop.<br /><br />Unlike most quiet storm songs, it sounds more like the bouncy stars-in-your-eyes infatuation phase -- like power pop. But this is only because he thinks his woman might be leaving him. Once she's beginning to distance herself, it's like having to court her all over again, and you get that adolescent courtship tone, instead of the purely mature tone of a pair-bonded couple that characterizes quiet storm songs.<br /><br />One of the coolest fusion songs ever recorded. Very much a forgotten gem -- reached #13 for the year in '81, and in the top 5 for the weekly Pop, Soul, and Adult Contempo charts. But you never hear it on '80s radio stations, '80s-related TV shows or movies, '80s night at nightclubs, or online commentary (including me -- probably the first I've mentioned it).agnostichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12967177967469961883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-67945174271318126732020-02-21T03:32:51.923-05:002020-02-21T03:32:51.923-05:00Jung didn't say much about gays. From what I f...Jung didn't say much about gays. From what I found, the only connection to developmental stunting is his view that homo relations are supposedly common among adolescent boys (wrong), and that those boys are supposed to mature beyond that stage and get married / have sex with / raise children with a woman.<br /><br />So, he's really saying that a male who had homo relations as an adolescent, and remains homosexual in adulthood, is stuck in an earlier stage of development.<br /><br />I'm saying that gay syndrome per se is a social-psych arrested development -- not only on the condition that the guy maintains gay relations into adulthood. And I'm pointing to the pre-adolescent or pre-pubescent stage, rather than adolescence, as the point where they're stuck.<br /><br />(Not stuck in general intelligence -- they wind up the same for that, but their social psych orientation remains pre-pubescent.)<br /><br />Teenage boys most certainly do not feel like "Ewww, girls are yucky," and do not preferentially get it on with other males. In a New England boarding school or in a Macedonian army stationed in the middle of nowhere -- where there's no access to females, in other words -- then sure, some guys will think "any port in a storm".<br /><br />I looked through this during 2012-'13 -- it's an entirely original theory. I thought maybe I'd happened upon it independently of someone who'd been banished from the canon, but there's no record of such a theory.<br /><br />Why had no one thought of it before, when it seems so obvious once it's laid out? Because they had theoretical preconceptions -- I had never studied it, and was just making observations about all the homos who used to go to the Starbucks I was hanging out at back then.<br /><br />It was during the push for gay marriage, and I bristled at the silly "just like us" propaganda -- at the least, everyone already knew how much more promiscuous and disease-burdened they were. But I'm not an ideologue, so I just kept my mind open to see whatever was there -- and every one of their thoughts, feelings, and actions was like that of a 5 year-old boy! It was uncanny.<br /><br />"Well of course -- that's the age when boys are not just un-attracted to girls, but are positively disgusted by them."<br /><br />The best science is done by induction, and so much social psych theory is just armchair bullshit from moral liberals.<br /><br />And again, it's not like I was providing support for a conservative theory -- they were just as clueless. They were mostly siding with the "gays as sissies / womanlike" framework -- despite gays having zero maternal instinct or desire to get pregnant, give birth, nurse babies, or nurture and raise children full-time.<br /><br />Same reason why I dismiss all trannies' claims about feeling they were born in the wrong body, and instead have a truly female or womanly nature. Then why don't you want surgery to give you a womb and functioning mammary glands, rather than a fuckhole between your legs and heaving cleavage? Hmmm, sounds like more of a sexual paraphilia than a desire to get in touch with your womanly nature...agnostichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12967177967469961883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-60795249917074687532020-02-20T16:41:43.366-05:002020-02-20T16:41:43.366-05:00Jung suggested it was the result of psychological ...Jung suggested it was the result of psychological stunting as well. There are some good realtalk nuggets in what I've read of his work. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-65925571068896029992020-02-20T10:11:26.350-05:002020-02-20T10:11:26.350-05:00Great post, glad to see you picking up the pace ag...Great post, glad to see you picking up the pace again this year.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com