tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post4874860178443189337..comments2024-03-28T21:56:51.675-04:00Comments on Face to Face: Why girls stay in emotionally abusive relationships (Warning: disillusionment ahead)agnostichttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12967177967469961883noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-83220270341232546662013-12-08T14:47:09.934-05:002013-12-08T14:47:09.934-05:00Wonder if Magic Johnson really has HIV?Wonder if Magic Johnson really has HIV?Manhattan Mongoloidnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-45230560527268155042013-12-06T16:09:36.981-05:002013-12-06T16:09:36.981-05:00Excellent post. Displays an unusually-sharp psych...Excellent post. Displays an unusually-sharp psychological insight. <br />Keep up the good work!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-26080388878940097592013-12-05T02:45:15.977-05:002013-12-05T02:45:15.977-05:00Some huge celebrity faked something big:
http://b...Some huge celebrity faked something big:<br /><br />http://blindgossip.com/?p=15640<br /><br />The consensus, based on the hints dropped, is that it was Kylie Minogue faking breast cancer in the mid-2000s.agnostichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12967177967469961883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-90057154959341704142013-12-05T01:45:50.004-05:002013-12-05T01:45:50.004-05:00And it goes on:
"Her students pitched in for...And it goes on:<br /><br />"Her students pitched in for a pink iPod she could listen to during chemo. In the fall of 2005, the school nominated Bass for the prestigious Disney Teacher of the Year Award. “[Bass] may be the finest teacher/inspiration I have ever been associated with in 32 years of education,” Jim Gottwald, the Paulding County principal told the Athens State University newsletter. But within days, the principal of Bass’s previous school, Tanner High—who had seen an article about her nomination—called Paulding County. That prompted a months-long investigation, which revealed that Bass had forged a doctor’s name on a certificate of disability that she gave Paulding’s associate superintendent, and had told students she’d drop low test scores if they donated $100 or more to Relay for Life, another cancer fund-raising race."<br /><br />"arc Feldman, M.D., a world-renowned psychiatrist, has treated more than 100 women who have faked serious illness. Though he has never met Bass, he believes he has her diagnosis: Munchausen syndrome, a psychological disorder in which someone feigns or self-induces illness to get attention and sympathy. According to Dr. Feldman, a clinical professor of psychiatry at the University of Alabama, Tuscaloosa, and author of Playing Sick?, these people know that they are lying, but typically don’t know why they’re compelled to do so"<br /><br />Anyway, here's the link to the article:<br />http://www.glamour.com/health-fitness/2008/10/she-said-she-had-breast-cancer-but-she-lied?currentPage=7<br /><br /><br />-Curtis<br /><br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-18444237716263240552013-12-05T01:26:00.003-05:002013-12-05T01:26:00.003-05:00Over the past few years, there have been examples ...Over the past few years, there have been examples of some women faking cancer. The same mechanism is at work - faking a crisis to get love and attention. Consider this case:<br /><br />" “I left my cell phone on my nightstand every night in case she needed anything,” says Ward, the dean of faculty. “On bad days I’d tell her, ‘We are going to attack this. We are going to fight.’” When Bass was too sick to teach, they’d cover her classes. And they kept a steady stream of casseroles and smoothies going to her condo. “We’d visit and she’d be shaking, pale and so sick,” says Pope, Webb’s technology coordinator. At school Bass would cover her head—bald from chemotherapy—with a knit cap, and limp from the tumor in her foot.<br /><br />In October Webb students and faculty put together a team for Komen Knoxville Race for the Cure to benefit the local breast cancer charity affiliate. “Suzy’s Crew for the Cure,” they called it. But when race day came, Bass was too weak to even walk. “She just met us at the finish line so she could cross it,” says Pope. As Bass’s condition worsened, she sent an e-mail to Pope thanking her for her support and friendship, and in an attached document, she outlined her last wishes. She asked that she be cremated, her ashes scattered in the Cayman Islands, with no tears: “I want whoever is sprinkling to be enjoying friends, family and loved ones, laughing and just having fun,” she said.<br /><br />.............................<br /><br />On April 21, Webb president Scott Hutchinson sat in his office, dumbfounded by the calls he’d received that day. Staffers from a school in Dallas, Georgia—where Bass once taught—had contacted him to expose what they claimed was Bass’s latest deception. An employee googled her former colleague to see what had become of her; she found the Knoxville News Sentinel article about the prom fund-raiser. Bass, the callers warned Hutchinson, had pretended to be a cancer patient during her tenure at their school—and at yet another one in Alabama.<br /><br />------------------------<br /><br />As news of Bass’s betrayal hit the hallways, emotions ranged from shock and rage to confusion and embarrassment. “I couldn’t help but think about the ‘end of chemo’ cake I’d baked her with a pink frosting ribbon,” remembers Moore. “That made me feel a little silly.” The entire Webb community had opened their hearts—and wallets—for Bass. Her freshman classes had even bought a refrigerator for her classroom where she kept Gatorade (hydration is key during chemotherapy). “I cried, I was mad, I had every emotion you could feel,” Pope says. When she broke the news to her daughter, Macy, the 13-year-old threw a breast cancer awareness band Bass had given her on the floor. “I can’t even look at this,” she said through tears. Teacher Amanda Rowcliffe, 47, thought of the night when Bass had called her, sobbing. “She said she’d just had her chemo port put in and was distraught about going to school with the ugly bandage showing,” Rowcliffe recalls. So she went out, bought and delivered a turtleneck to Bass’s home. “I felt so betrayed,” she says."<br /><br />-Curtis<br /><br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-15664836464141530942013-12-05T01:14:52.804-05:002013-12-05T01:14:52.804-05:00"I think you're underestimating the *attr..."I think you're underestimating the *attraction* that these men hold for these girls."<br /><br />No, that is a myth invented by the self-help industry, and stoked by the media, because a certain type of man wants to believe its true.<br /><br />Of course, a woman wants a man who can protect her. But this is not the same thing as women craving abuse - which they don't. <br /><br />Many years ago, I remember reading about a study done on women who write letters to serial killers. It found that they tended to be socially reclusive. This fits in with the blog author's argument that socially immature women, who want attention, are more likely to hook up with cruel men. (the study researchers also speculated that reclusive women, suffering from paranoia, believed that only a psychopath could protect them from a dangerous world).<br /><br />(sorry, I'm too distracted to look for the study myself, but I'd be interested in Dusk in Autumn's stance on why many women do write letters to serial killers) <br /><br />-Curtis <br /><br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-37421151069247960472013-12-04T23:34:56.140-05:002013-12-04T23:34:56.140-05:00Whoa, Matthew Shepard.
I didn't know that S...Whoa, Matthew Shepard. <br /><br />I didn't know that Shepard was HIV positive and used drugs or that his killer was queer. <br />asnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-89872665156973044612013-12-04T19:26:03.963-05:002013-12-04T19:26:03.963-05:00Hystrionic women at least have family, whether the...Hystrionic women at least have family, whether they're close by to give them a hug in person or not. And if they don't have friends, they always have workmates, dorm-mates, or perfect strangers who they don't mind revealing their dramatic life to, or blurting it out in TMI attention-seeking fashion.<br /><br />I don't see signs of attraction, when you control for other things. Like with Fez -- everybody chiming in at Blind Gossip says he's ugly, untalented, a has-been, slimy, creepy, not rich by Hollywood standards, etc.<br /><br />When women are attracted to demeaning types, there's usually something else there that makes us think of it as a pro vs. con balance.<br /><br />Someone like Demi Lovato doesn't appear to be attracted to her boyfriend at all, but more thrilled by all the chaos and rescuing that is in store for her.<br /><br />Guys who aren't demeaning, she wouldn't find unattractive -- that implies something akin to disgust or repulsion (whatever degree). Like you said, though, it's more like "meh, boring -- no drama to be had here, next." Not like "Eww, what's with his face?" Or "Eww, he has no job or money?" Etc.agnostichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12967177967469961883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-83649039262283613682013-12-04T17:14:07.951-05:002013-12-04T17:14:07.951-05:00You make some good points, but this doesn't re...You make some good points, but this doesn't really suffice to explain those women in abusive relationships who have no close friends or even family members to turn to.<br /><br />It's not uncommon for controlling, abusive men to lock out other people from their girlfriend's or wive's lives.<br /><br />I think you're underestimating the *attraction* that these men hold for these girls.<br /><br />Sure they crave the drama and attention, but they are also usually genuinely attracted to these men. The corollary is that they are intensely unattracted to normal, well-adjusted, non-abusive men, as any guy who has tried to date one of these girls will discover. Non-abusive men bore them and may even appear non-sexual and repulsive.Therapsidnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-63953428126427616682013-12-04T15:00:17.310-05:002013-12-04T15:00:17.310-05:00Also worth noting Eric Berne's birth year -- 1...Also worth noting Eric Berne's birth year -- 1910 (Greatest Gen), similar to someone born in 1969 (Gen X), as far as where in the cocooning/crime cycle they're born.<br /><br />The lack of open, informal, trusting, and intimate interactions during the mid-century must not have stood out much to the youngish people of the time, the Silents. And if observers were born too far back, they might also have felt right at home in the mid-century.<br /><br />Their formative years had to have been during the more unsupervised, outgoing, and rising-crime period of the '10s and '20s (and early '30s), to feel lifelong whiplash, socially and culturally.<br /><br />See also: Sloan Wilson, Betty Friedan.agnostichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12967177967469961883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-26822529633272806952013-12-04T14:44:11.307-05:002013-12-04T14:44:11.307-05:00I haven't. Interesting to note that it came ou...I haven't. Interesting to note that it came out in 1964, based on ideas he'd formed in the late '50s. I wonder if mid-century people were going through something similar to our fake victim cult today. Not in an identity politics framework, obviously.<br /><br />The abandonment anxiety mixed with a lack of desire to connect to others (only wanting their periodic gushing reassurance), smells like symptoms of cocooning. When you're socially isolated, you don't get much feedback that other people care about you. But that same cocooning mindset keeps you from letting normal people get close and establishing enduring bonds.<br /><br />Shades of the juvenile delinquency chic of the 1950s? Mid-century culture was very melodramatic, maybe Berne said what a lot of others were thinking at the time -- enough melodrama already.agnostichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12967177967469961883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19346366.post-559909637519707422013-12-04T06:15:01.288-05:002013-12-04T06:15:01.288-05:00Have you read "Games People Play" by Eri...Have you read "Games People Play" by Eric Berne?Brandonnoreply@blogger.com