July 27, 2008

"My gf hangs out with her students -- is it a problem?"

Some castrated boob writes in to Slate's manners columnist:

My girlfriend, who is in her mid-20s, is a kind, smart, talented teacher and coaches several sports. We love each other very much, and I believe this is the woman I want to spend my life with. She has bonded with a lot of her players, almost all of whom are boys no older than 16. As a teacher and coach myself, I understand this bond and support it completely. However, with a few of them she makes an effort to get together outside of school or practice. She's attempted to go running with them, take them out for dinner or lunch, or just plain hang out with them. She texts back and forth with them often. When I've broached the subject with her, she writes it off as me being silly and tells me that she just feels bad that "Roger" doesn't have a mother and his father's drunk all the time, or that "Jack's" mother neglects him and he has no one to turn to. Am I actually blowing this out of proportion, or should I be worried about her behavior?

—Worried Coach

Dear Coach,

Your dream-bride is also giving blowjobs to her players from the passenger's seat, stopping only to stifle her laughter as the teenage boy makes fun of how gullible you are.


  1. Yup, thats exactly what is happening.

    This is a prime example of society not treating a female crime the same as a male crime. If you were a 26 year old, still-youthful looking-softball coach and were getting blow jobs from your entire outfield, believe me the law would not laugh it off. You would be going to prison for a good decade, even if it was consensual.

    Someone in their mid-twenties should not want to hang out with immature 16 year olds. It goes to show how intellectually vacous she must be. I bet she hasn't read more than five books that she wasn't required to read in her life. Speaking to a barbaric pimply-faced-teen of this generation usually isn't a pleasurable experience, especially the male ones who are by-and-large, doofuses.

    Guy needs to get an attorney, salvage his self-respect, and put on his poon-hunting gear and attitude and find another whore.

  2. This is a prime example of society not treating a female crime the same as a male crime.

    Actually females who have sex with their male students are not punished less than males who have sex with their female students.

    But even if they were, it could be argued that the double standard is legitimate based on the marked sex differences in having such an experience. Females are often hurt by such experiences, while males often find them pleasurable:

    "[Female reactions were] predominantly of fear, unpleasant confusion, and embarrassment ... [while men's] remembered reactions were mostly either indifference, tinged perhaps with slight anxiety, or of positive pleasure, the latter being particularly evident in contacts with the opposite sex" (p. 122).

  3. Yeah, one thing to keep in mind is that people would think it's normal for a mid-20s guy to sleep with his teenage students or soccer players or whatever -- and also that he was a bastard for doing so, and perhaps should be locked up, but they would understand.

    When a mid-20s girl sleeps with her teenage students or players, it's highly unusual, so people will think she's some kind of freak, a witch maybe. Since it's more shocking, people react more negatively, like when they see a babyfaced serial killer instead of the thuggish character they imagined.

  4. It's just not fair that I didn't have such a teacher while in high school.

    There's nothing wrong with it as long as there's no conflict of interest. Lucky students. Usually women in their mid 20's are the hardest to get.

  5. It's just not fair that I didn't have such a teacher while in high school.

    Were you a popular jock, a high-ranking drug dealer, or just plain hot? That's who these cougar teachers are banging, after all.

  6. None of the above. So yeah, I guess even if they were looking I didn't have a chance. I guess I'm decent looking, but wasn't in very good shape in hs.

  7. It's like imagining how great polygamy would be -- great for the few who have tons of wives, not great for the majority who get none. But no one ever imagines himself as one of the wife-less guys.

  8. Sharing is caring!

  9. We have a new teacher fucks student story in Tennessee.

    You can google it and you will probably find it. I think it was down in Franklin, an extremely wealthy suburb of Nashville with McMansions as far as the eye can see.

    A GIRLS parents found the girls phone, and noticed there were NUDE pictures of one of her FEMALE teachers on it. The teachers name started with a "T" if I remember correcty. She was 35. She and the girl were having some Isle of Lesbos lovin' going on.

    Teacher got fired.

    Man, no shit...............there have been a few cases of teacher student lust here in the Volunteer State (no jokes please). Two blonde teachers, one pretty cute and the other incredibly hot. A black guy over in Smyrna, and there have been a couple of more but I forget the details of them.

    I know mostly guys read this blog........think for a second about finding out your fifteen year old boy is getting cornholed by his Gym teacher. Let that sink in for a second. Would you be pissed? I would be ready to take a baseball bat to someone's noggin. This is so perverted. There are PLENTY of adults who will hump a stickerbush. No need to poach the bunnies.


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